Tuesday, December 27, 2016

All Is Ok

whenever the mood is right and the air somehow hugs
something inside asks to stop and breathe in the moment's light
all slows down and begins to shine and all in nature reaches toward the sun
in that frame of time you can begin to smile and find a new dial

everything is fine the way it is now
all the little "if's and but's" just need a place to sit down
they are hungry sometimes
and they need to feel alive
only trouble with them
they suck the life out of every cell

whenever you can
see the brightness of day
nothing lasts for too long
all is ok in the midst of mind's panic call


Monday, December 26, 2016

Break Down and Sing

just take me wherever you need me to be
and squeeze out the best that I have in me
and soften the edges that are yet to be freed
and don't let me wait until I can see

I need you to take this shaking hand
I ask that you lead through the darkness ahead
I hope you can see past the mistakes made
I am learning the meaning of the word 'had'

show me the steps to be followed
give me the worlds to be swallowed
break down the walls erected way back when
let the presence be singing once again

Monday, December 12, 2016

Pure

diving deep
eyes closed
wanting to see
only hope
deceiving yourself
choosing not to know
hungry needs
obstructing the flow
longing to hold
the tiniest glow
disappear into the dark
and walk out white, pure like snow

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Let It Melt

words and words and more useless words
twirling inside in circles and ovals
returning like clouds on a rainy day
never wanting to leave the warm bed

nothing new arises from them
same old patterns recreating themselves
what's left to do is empty the bin
sit very quietly and let it all melt

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Cycles

every evening sun goes down
every night a chirping sound
every creature has its life
every heart beats day and night

loud and clear smiles are near
children's laughter is so dear
walking on grass of green and dust
feeling the earth beneath wanderlust

quiet and serene the evening feels
daytime has gone and went to sleep
with open eyes the winter comes
every day a new cycle starts



Monday, December 5, 2016

Unfinished

just want to open the page and see the words paint themselves
nothing to add of any wisdom as this life's journey seems so distant
and still i walk and then i crawl and scream in silence, hoping it's heard
to break away from all the chains that keep the dark veil fall like hail
putting one foot in front of other and looking up when clouds are parting
hope never dies, it's always ready to pull you out of your mind's wail

Friday, November 11, 2016

Consciously

little pieces fall to earth
of walls that protected the tiny bird
sit down on warm ground
it will light up the life inside
this little body has to find the right spot
breathe deeply and gently
feel the cavernous current
its only purpose is to throw you in throws
it will calm and feed you in ways new to you
you can know the stillness and clarity, too
it is like a magician has shown you the trick
and you don’t need to know the mechanics of it
you just find that warm corner in the smallest of space

open up all your senses and give in to nothingness

Monday, November 7, 2016

Butterflies Fly

how it all works only boggles my mind
one minute you're down and then fully alive
yesterday's sorrow and pain turn to nil
gratitude and sharing spilling down the hill

world takes care how you can't understand
it keeps on showing its caring ways
continue this journey with no fear or doubt
if you can't see clearly, you have painted that darkness

do not listen to those who've dismissed you in past
never underestimate the power of a human life
grow humility and power inside your heart
there aren't any obstacles if you say "I just might!"

please remember to hold your visions clear
and be wise enough to accept guidance when given
there is very little shame in admitting fear,
yet remember, one thing, do not hold it dear

how it all really works, i cannot explain
maybe sun and the moon are having their way
but the butterflies fly out of caterpillar's design
even they spread their wings and take to flight


Saturday, November 5, 2016

Unsettled

inadequate: too big, no too small, too loud, no too soft
too that and a bit much of that
inconsistently steady
the target escapes the eye
whatever the scene, 
more to be explored
unable to be with no need to seek

Monday, October 17, 2016

Emptiness

love is beyond
your own desire
it gives you power
in serving the other
it is one paradox
that scares the mind
yet the true giving
can feel so divine
and so it is only 
fair to post
love's only purpose
is to become a ghost
with no petty whims
and demands to present
just become emptiness
and fill that space
with another's face
unite with grace
in surrender of an embrace

Become the One

wanting to write
a verse or two
with nothing in mind
and nothing to prove
just sitting and staring
and wanting to know
the man and his curtain
and the road out there
and they see the light
and flock in packs
they, too, want to know
not knowing which way to go
they stand and they run
they might smile or hide
yet no matter the show
the light's still aglow
and there is no way in hell
it intends to stay away
it will keep getting bright
until it is so hot
it turns into white
and moves about untouched
and the only prayer
that goes out there
is to tread with care
do not step just anywhere
be aware of your hand
and what it holds
because though it's on
it might become gone
and you'll miss the charm
that pulled out your harm
be sweet and be kind
be gentle like the divine
be here and now
take your time
ignite from inside
become the one
clean and alive

Monday, October 10, 2016

I Would

I never knew
When you walked on through
I would look at you
I would pay my due
I would stand with you
I would reach to you
I would give for you
I would hold all of you

I would stand before you
I would fully adore you
I would smile and warm you
I would want nothing of you
I would put down my guard
I would relax and be kind
I would glow like the sun
I become the innocent one

I never knew
When you waltzed on through
I would look at you
And forget what to do
I would stand next to you
And feel morning's dew
I would reach out to you
And pour out 
My love
My heart
My angels
My compassion

I never knew
When you glided on through
I would skip the cue
Look 
And feel the sweetness of you

Thank you...






Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Laugh Full Out

From the bottom of the heart
Let the voice be clear and loud
Please arise above the ground
Dance and sing and laugh full out

From the depth of the soul
Turn on the engine of hope
Don't let the darkness float
Jump and run and sprint, don't mope

Close your eyes and be in silence
Hear the birds in the morning's aliveness
Stretch out your arms in grandest kindness
Smile with the sun and bow down in genuine gladness

For this brief life is full of surprises




Real Simplicity

come here everyone and everything
lay down in my lap and be at ease
shed all the tears you've gathered through your life
sit still, my darling creatures, and relax

there is no need to hurry to the line
and no room to worry of what's mine
my hand has long been open to you
just take it with no fear- nothing to do

look deeply in my eyes and shed your walls
and fall completely and utterly in love
forget that which you think you want to be
stay close, really near, in real simplicity


Thursday, September 1, 2016

Continual Process

a muse an inspiration a pretty dancer
a maze an inquiry a process of manifestation
a dress and skirt and pretty pink bracelet
a sage an angel a true connection
behind the eye a revelation
below the surface a world of nations
beneath the skin a salvation
bewitched bedazzled a desired formulation
to be transformed into the grandest creation

Simply Be

creating a longing
that's deep and true
realizing the work
that is still left to do
sitting down in pleasure
with open hand
having the wisdom
to know when to dive in
and the rest?
that will simply be

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Road Signs

Just a little something tiny
Flowing quickly through the keys
Life is funny, really funny
No one knows his destiny
Clearly knowing one's longing
Knowing clearly the way to be
She appears to be abundant
Gifts are many to be received
Now that the road is upon us
May the journey be a thrill
May the signs spell out properly
All the turns to the life of living free

Friday, August 12, 2016

To the Truth


The magic of grace
Puts me in haste
Take me ahead
In the fastest of pace
Stretch me out
Until no longer found
Play me loud
Until I'm a silent sound
Sweep me up
Hold me tight
Send me in flight
To truth of this life

Thursday, July 28, 2016

Enjoy the Ride!

Only what's in front of me should be seen
Future's created by the mind for its fun
Projection into tomorrow can bring sorrow
Plans made out of your darkness can stop progress

I walk beside you as you are today
I look inside myself from where I stand
Enjoying what presents itself right now
My longing is too big to know the how

The content of today is not what matters
Perception in my mind creates gladness
(Or sadness or madness)
I work with what is given at any given time
Give myself freely and enjoy the entire ride

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Now

Stretching the legs across the pavement
Hugging the air thickened with heat
Wanting to know the truth behind the glamour
Here I go, through thick and thin

Not knowing tomorrow's plan or game
Putting one foot down on dirty sand
Hearing the fear singing a tune
Choosing to notice the flowers in bloom

Lizards and cats, butterflies with spots
Life keeps on buzzing around the clock
Future's unknown in our only home
Before we lie down, close eyes, and say goodbye

Sunday, July 24, 2016

Behind the Glitter

Once again
Walking the road
Seeing the dirt
And noise of the globe
Dusty and broken
Many a-dreams
Cold and frozen
Hearts within
Covered in hues
Faces and necks
Glasses and lipsticks
Shawls and braids
Trying and trying
Searching in things
Tears are running
Hiding the scream

Nothing to lose
Save for the blues
Put down the bottle
Bury the throttle
Walk outside
Notice the light
Look at the child
Amid the crowd
No need to run
Put down the gun
Please don't pretend
Be frank with a friend
Take off the shades
Connect and dance
Find the key
To eternity

Saturday, July 23, 2016

Dreams Come True

The depth of living has no end
A new beginning everyday
The peaks are many, can't see the top
Just keep on climbing, don't try to stop

A state of flying high is real
Can't be contained, dethroned, or killed
It pours out of every pore
And other creatures can enjoy

The fear of what may be or come
Has no place to park its car
No matter what happens out there
The calm inside can climb out of anywhere

The future's bright with now's delight
The sun is shining big and bright
The moon is glowing in the dark
Dreams do come true, just find a steady mark




One Breath Away

Can it be so?
Can it be true?

Once I go
Life begins?

Such contradiction
Such a confused state
Yet bursting with joy
All through the day

Sizzle it down
To ashes of grey
Winds may carry
What's left of hell

Bubbling with ease
Floating through space
Once I unmistakably go
Freedom's one breath away

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Big Something

In silence and in laughter
In sitting and ever after
The presence of big something
Stirred up by a great master

In words and in singing

In walking and in screaming
The pulsing of big something
Ignited by a great master

And just like this it goes

Like rivers flowing northward
And just like that it shows
Like summer's breeze in autumn

In every step of life

In all that breathes and sighs
Expanding from inside
Started by a great light


...in deep gratitude...

Monday, July 18, 2016

Ardor

Don't lie to yourself
There is no need
And you will deprive yourself
Of knowing the sweet
That lies within you
And radiates out
And then it reflects
Right back at you
With a much louder sound

You cannot know 
The truth of life
If you keep feeding
Yourself with lies
They will tear you apart
Before too late
Hard to put it all back together
When the pieces have fallen
With the best of luck

Step into the world
Of a different purpose
The angels there
Make another purchase
You can relax
In full surrender
No need to worry
Of where they take you
Just be yourself
With no armor
When your steel melts
You'll cry with ardor


Barely

Whatever happens next makes very little difference
The way the path unfolded has taken me long distance
I am eager to be fully immersed in this existence
This life is too profound to know watching TV glimpses

I sit with eyes wide open and closed all at once
I stretch my arms wide open and smile with the sun
The thoughts may come and take me on rollercoaster ride
Yet now, I know better, the joy of a different kind

Wherever train tracks take me or airplane lifts off
I worry not a moment how it will all unfold
The willingness to know and give myself to life
Have sent this being soaring to heights of the greater kind

This life has just only now barely begun


Beyond Words

Not to this one, not like this
No imagination to concoct this
Sitting and sitting and sitting some more
Removing the real from the truth is a choice

Can't understand the way it all works
Good to just witness and feel the burn
Good to just jump on the bus at the stop
It keeps on taking more fantastic rides

Constantly moving from here to there
Ultimately ending up not here or there
Closing the chapter for the life of sleep
Going forward until all's complete






Thursday, July 14, 2016

Just Jump

Wait a minute!
This is me
Standing here
Talking to thee

Look at me
And really see
Who is there
In front of thee

Nothing old
Remains inside
All is shining
With golden light

Beaming life
In all directions
Touching you
In new dimensions

Take a bow
And hold the treasure
Hug it close
For a good measure

It will not remain the same
It grows quickly every day

Look at me
It's there to see
Nothing's hidden
All is free

You can know
The truth of thee
Just jump in
And give in to me

Monday, July 11, 2016

It's Safe

talk to me freely
and keep me close
show me yourself
and be my host

glide with me
into tomorrow's now
please allow me
to take you higher

ready for action
with all my being
bursting to know
the greatest wisdom

talk to me please
keep up with me
strip and be bare
in my safe company

Illogical

Close your eyes to see what is there to be seen
Say goodbye to your thoughts to know
Keep your feet still to walk far
Give away your heart to feel alive
None of the real makes logical sense
Truth appears on your doorstep when you leave 
Time to go, darling, time to go...

Saturday, July 9, 2016

Being Silent

long ago i've seen tomorrow
shadows and dreams of yester-sorrow
looking with eyes, they are wide open
full of hope and always glowing
noticing thrills within the body
longing to go beyond their power
taking your hand with full disclosure
trusting that you will be the knowing
don't want to teach and don't want to speak
don't want to think and don't want to seek
rising through storm brought on by war
heaven awaits with room for two more
on trampoline i've climbed just now
jumping up high and falling down
maybe one day the sound will break
stillness awaits, i'll be it someday





Monday, July 4, 2016

Being Found

a star
a spark
a secret
uncovered

a house
a door
a vision
obscured

a hope
a heart
a hand
removed

too many games
too many fumes

just keep on 
walking
just keep on 
wishing
just keep on 
dusting
the best of
visions

the day will come
when the sun will shine
the time will find
when the stage's been set right
the fire will ignite
when the match lights up
the scene will show up
and the eye will cry

because it will see
the best of it all
because it will acknowledge
it's found the core
because it will settle
into the now
because it will know
it has been found

Saturday, July 2, 2016

Periwinkle Sky

"This is crazy!' 
She exclaimed
"Periwinkle sky!
Oh man!"

How often do you see
Something magical like this?!
How frequently do you
Look up high and see love, too?

Every leaf on every tree
Sings a song
Just for me

And the winds
They add the beat
And the sun
It makes you feel bliss

And the periwinkle sky above 
Invites me to sit down 
And write this verse

Oh, the creatures of this land
So many of you partake
In the making of our lives
Every single day and night

May I always be aware
Of the colors in the air
Of the subtle and quiet beauty
That is everywhere,  nothing's excluded

Sit with me
On this old bench
Be with me
Like it's the end
Look at periwinkle sky

Smile and enjoy being alive

Friday, July 1, 2016

Sweetness Around Me

Sweetness around me
Melts me inside
Softens the walls
That might have built up

Gentle man's honor
Opens my heart
I can really bow down
To the one who's done the inner job

Lift me much higher
Than I've ever been
Don't pull me down
From where I am

Dream of the second
I break through chain's link
Because the last ingredient
I am missing still

Sweetness around me
Brings me to my knees
I would love to serve you
And all of you needs

I would love to love you
And cherish the way
Because all I am seeking
Is a permanent exit out of mind's hell

But I need to know 
You are just as true
As I stand before you
Naked and innocent, too

There is something there
In this complex life
That I need to see
That I need to find

And whatever way
Tomorrow goes
And whatever may
Show up and grow

I am here 
With eyes wide open
To find the missing piece
To the greatest knowing

That the voice inside
Keeps on trying to show me





Tuesday, June 28, 2016

It's Time

many days and years have passed
many moons and sun phases have gone by
largely unknown to this blinking eye
world keeps changing to the beat of its own drum

knowing how spiders can make their web
experiencing breeze, holding a big embrace
sitting quiet with a feeling of a happy face
wanting to speak nothing amid the world's maze

we cannot know the end of the line
we cannot comprehend the beyond
we cannot imagine that which can be
we can only be wise enough to see

that our senses are tiny
that our minds are corrupt
that our hearts have shut down
that our hands have closed up

that we feel a bit frightened
that we want to protect
that all we really desire
is truth and a steady hand 

and when it appears
it is wise that we reach
for the help being offered
without fight or a kick

because many days and years
have already gone by
because many moons and phases
have passed before our eyes
because we don't have a forever
to wait in dark night
because it's time we decided
we are ready to shine

Sunday, June 26, 2016

Seed of the Soul

lines
sketching
across
the page
images
formed
in recesses
of the brain

words
are paints
of various
strength
jumping
right out
without
hesitation

expression
comes
freely
sometimes
without goal
just wanting
to spread
the seed
of the soul

from here to
there and
all across 
land
the stalks
of innocence
rise to see
the day
happily
moving
with breeze
and the bees
look
at the
opportunity
to laugh and
to feel

and joyfully
be

Saturday, June 25, 2016

Somewhere Inside

Well, I wake up and stretch my body and do a dance with the divine
And then I drive to see a woman who longs to dance but doesn't know how
I spin around and do what's needed without wanting to be thanked
And yet there is no way of escaping which seems to shine without effort
She holds me dear in her warm body and keeps me hanging on for long
Because somewhere inside she knows, there is something more to know

I have been taught how to live fully and I have learned to listen well
And when I do, there is no stopping to what I am capable to handle
It isn't said like I am bragging, because I know all too well
The road ahead is very windy and many boulders line the way
And yet the eyes can't hide the freedom that lies beneath the fear and greed
That's why I long to keep on giving to end the cycle of building me

I woke up and stretched my body and danced a little with the divine
I drove to see the pretty woman to break myself of my own lies
I spun around and did the work to make the project come to life
Because somewhere inside I know, my work has only just begun

Thursday, June 23, 2016

Willing to See

Please pay attention
To the tricks of your mind
You keep celebrating
The mess you have become
Remember the unfolding
As it actually is
Don't make an excuse
For your inadequacies
Looking to know what made you this way
Takes away from the issues at hand
It is ok to admit you don't know
It is ok to cry when you're hurting
Please pay attention 
To the tricks of your mind
Don't celebrate
The mess that you are
Keep on desiring 
To go past the wall
That has imprisoned you for much too long
It is a lonesome road, indeed
Sweetness awaits you
If you're willing to see
There you can rest
There, it is easy to live

Monday, June 20, 2016

Good Night

Good night, people of the world
Good night, insects and the bees
Hope you find your covers ready
To envelop you in your sweetest reverie

May you find your pillow comfy
May your find your perfect spot
May you smile as you are falling
To a state of being not

Turn your fire into coolness
Turn your fear into a dance
Turn your head in the direction
To take you far away from fake

Good night, children of the parents
Good night, birds and trees and mice
Hope you can express your wisdom
In the things that make up life

Friday, June 17, 2016

Privilege Yet To Be

The privilege of life
Bursts forth on the mat
Fire is growing bright
Body feeling light
Reaching up and high
Pressing the anchor down
Smile overtakes face
Tears of joy surface
Gratefully rising from floor
Leaping into tomorrow's world
Impatiently waiting to see
The privilege of life yet to be


Thursday, June 16, 2016

Oh!

Oh how I love thee
Oh how I long
Oh how I want thee
To know the core

I am so impatient
I am so impassioned
I am so pleasured
To take your warm hand

Cannot wait to sit you
Cannot wait to place you
Cannot wait to show you
Another way

The grandeur of life
The grandeur of breath
The grandeur of knowing
That stillness awaits

Oh walk into me
Oh walk beside me
Oh walk eyeing me until
Very slowly 
You dissolve your heartbeat
And I 
Very hastily 
Will follow thee




Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Stupid Past

Stupid wife
In this beautiful life
Sharp knife
In this unskilled fight
Silly lies
In the dark aisles
Spun around
Left upside down
Dotted the "i"
With one last sigh
Closed the door
Set the foot forth
Onwardly motion
Fueled by emotion
Into the night
Into the light
Into new arms
And out of the past

Sunday, June 12, 2016

Both Cheeks

nope, not here
wait, almost it
stopping and going
tear down the cheek

looking, not seeing
many things bleak
open the window
and tears down the cheek

depth, not darkness
calling, pulling in
wheels are spinning
with tears down both cheeks

Saturday, June 11, 2016

Rhymes, dreams, and floats

Rhyming is easy
Rhyming is fun
Rhymes can come quickly
Or take a lifetime

Dreaming is easy
Dreaming is fun
Dreams can come quickly
Or take a lifetime

Soaring up high
To the deepest blue sky
Training is longer
Than one short lifetime

Dreaming in rhymes
Soaring to dare
Living this life
With the utmost flare

Care and dare
Share and be fair
Dig tooth and nail
Be free and be bare
Leaving the known
To rest in peace
Jump to cold river and float 
To destination mystical bliss

There, cannot be amiss

Props

If I were to drive into the end
How long would it take for the pedal to break
Can I see the road enough ahead
To see the wisdom that hides instead

The cover's opaque and thick like the cloud
Only right now is seen with a lot of challenge
Three steps forward with wind in my sails
I just put head down and coat my nails

Whatever you want I will gladly be that
Just take this small hand and put light in this eye
The view is not as big as it can and should be
My being calls for the moon, the stars, and grand ecstasy

Send me a prop or two. Ok, maybe three



Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Today

sitting
dreaming
biting
time

patiently
eagerly
wanting
to rise

looking
observing
probing
with tricks

drawing
pulling
enticing
your speech

once and
for all
give do
not hold
lift this
old weight
diffuse its
defense

softly
slowly
gently
break

take
this cocoon
apart
time to
evanesce

today

Monday, June 6, 2016

Catch A Star

Falling, shining, shooting star
How I hope you hit my heart
Twirling, swirling, circling near
When will you appear, my dear
Waiting and waiting and waiting some more
Only projection is seen and that is all
Near the ground and in the smallest thistle
Can only be found by the quietest of whistles
Falling and shining and shooting through sky
Melting with warmth from the burning red star
Twirling and swirling and circling in spheres
Land in my lap and drop all your fears

Friday, June 3, 2016

One Desire

Writing all hours in day and at night
Gentle reminders keep the words alive
Looking for ways to capture the moment
Always evolving and never conforming

Drama of mind plays various games
Keeping a vigil to not become its prey
Looking beyond the first illusions
Staying right here with future visions

Placing one foot in front of the other
Closing the eyes to the boring chatter
Hearing the wind through the green of trees
Desiring to give what's inside endlessly

Thursday, June 2, 2016

Final Fall

Don't really know how to see the intelligence in the blade of grass
In the stamp of innocence
Don't really know how to see all the joy in the crawling ant
In the music's score

Don't really know how to find hidden meaning in the fall of the rain
In the hand that keeps giving
Don't really know how to find good advice in the cover of the night
In the touch of your heart

Walking with care over rocks and small creatures
Walking on air would be the point worth reaching
Seeing the real and the colors unfold
Walking and walking until the final fall, with devotion,
Into intelligence
Into innocence
Into joy
And, hungrily, into ultimate emptiness




See You

Tears in my heart
Softness in my eyes
Seeing you in sweetness
Open like existence
Want to hold you near
Now and much later
I just see the kindness
Pouring out with madness

Would like to protect you
From the cold of winter
Would like to support you
Anytime you need me
Want to tell the world
To keep its claws curled
All I see is your divinity
Through my eyes of endless possibility


Tuesday, May 31, 2016

My Wish

What do I know about your life and what do you know about the shining sun?
Whom do I take by the hand to cross the street and whom does the bell ring for, if not for thee?

Strolling alongside me with eyes on my face, posture majestic in your eyes' embrace
Everything sings of peace and deep content, shining sun setting on others' weary heads

Nothing's required and nothing's pursued, all that is needed is the gaze made of you
Leaning to center inside and out, my wish is for you to find your sweet and solid ground.

Sunday, May 29, 2016

Walking

To walk the road of life is something else, it's rather windy and has many dead ends, and it curves so much, we cannot see ahead, so we need to slow down and sometimes hope for the best.

What is covered by dust through the years of lethargy will need the attention of a painter in ecstasy, every grain of the sand may need to be carefully studied unless you like the strength of a leaf blower power.

And sometimes we need help, and sometimes we need a kick in the pants, and sometimes we need to cry and sometimes we need to be sly, and sometimes we fall to our knees and sometimes we jump like we've been bitten.

All in all, life is much like a dance between darkness and light, the stark madness and the sweet romance, until all of it goes beyond this yin and yang, it all comes together into a giant nothingness.

You can take all of you and fill it with all, you can take all of you and gracefully fall, you can take all of you and give it away, whatever the course, it is here to be walked.


Too Good

A process making its way down the hill
Pulling me along while I kick and scream
Hitting my head on tall and short walls
Bounce right back and then sing a fun song.
Movement comes out in the waves of my hips
Energy rises and spreads out in great leaps.
I stop for a moment to assess the road til now
Chuckle a bit and dive headlong to the unknown.
It's all in the process that things are revealed
Whatever the journey, its river's quite deep.
Just seeing myself in the light of the moon
Once settled and nestled, this life is simply too good.



Monday, May 16, 2016

Ready

Strip me of myself
Burn me to the ground
Burst me at the seams
Simmer me way down

Catch a falling star
Strolling to the west
Shoot the arrow straight
Slow like my breath

Strip me of my walls
Burn me, no hesitation
Bring me to my knees
Begging you, existence